She reminded me...

Outside was quite the muggy day. Fog creeping up on your doorstep like those scary movies, just about ready to grab your feet, then again it's just a gasp of cloud. I pressed the garage door button to close it and quickly dash under the garage door. Trying not to hit the sensor beam to open the garage again. Woshppppppph! Nearly lost my grip of the ground. I just recently ice stormed over our little town. Our trees were crystallized; when the sun shined at the right spot, you could see the beauty of the world.

I quickly rushed to the door, as the cold was biting on to me. I just got up to send my brother to school. I wasn't dressed yet, just in my sweats and a warm sweater, and a jacket tossed on. I had one of those puffy jackets, you know the ones that make you look as if you were a marshmallow. I opened the door, slipped off my shoes at the front door, as all Hmong families do. Then quickly turned and raced down the steps, threw my jacket and sweater off on my rocking chair.

Beep, boop, my computer started up. The blue glimmering lights shined in the darkness of my room.Before long, I was logged on to HP again as usual. Today was an awkward moment, as soon as I hit the chatroom, everyone welecomed me. Then there was this random girl who said hi to me. Didn't have a single clue who she was. I tried to ask her how she knew me but I didn't get any response from her. Everyone else muttered that I go chat so much that everyone ought to know me. They always say, there's hardly a person who doesn't know my name. Of course, doesn't mean I'm famous or anything, I'm just friendly.

I thought she was someone else, so I called her by that name. Soon enough, I figured that she just played along with me. I was just another clown sitting on the dunk tank and she kept throwing balls. Luckily I didn't fall in yet even though she hit the target. She didn't hit it hard enough. I told her to add me onto MSN since she knew who I was. Apparently, I just tried to trick her into revealing who she was. Didn't work too well though, since her MSN didn't display who she was. Her picture was hidden from my view and every time I would ask her, she would shy away from the subject.

I talked to her for hours on, trying to figure out who she was. I was like one of those chess geeks, poundering at what move to make next before my time was up. Across the board, or the net, this time was the other geek who was cleverly hiding their skills and thinking of new plans to trick me to coming out, so they can defeat my king. Finally after hours end on hours, she finally showed me who she was on cam. At the glance of her chin, she looked so familiar, as if I knew her from another life time. I knew that I have seen that chin of hers, the way she smiled. Her teeth, that nose. And yet, she wouldn't reveal to me what her eyes looked like. I quickly asked, "Would you please move the cam so I can see who you really are?" She adjusted the cam a bit, yet not revealing who she was either.

I kindly asked her to smile for me. As I believe that any girl is defined by her smile. Her smile was so beautiful, it sparked up her entire face. I felt as if I had kissed those lips before, as if I had pressed against those bare skin of her cheeks. I swore, I stared deeply into those beautiful eyes before and told her that I loved her. I couldn't figure, my mind just went berserk. My heart sung as if I was in love with her. I then asked her for a name. She replied with her name, of which I cannot name. "What?!" my mind questioned, "This beautiful lady, is she not that person of which I once love?" How come she possesses a different name, age, location, and everything was different. But her looks, so convincing to my mind that she was the beauty that I once loved. She has to be.

Then suddenly, she turned off her cam. I asked her why. She told me she had to sleep, for she had school in the early morning. She said she would return tomorrow to continue chatting with me. My mind cleared up and wished her a goodnight and sweet dreams. That night, I pondered on, deciding whether or not she was the person of which I once loved. What are the chances? They look exactly alike, yet act differently.

Tomorrow, I got up early. I awaited for her to come online all day. My heart raced as each minute ticked on the clock. I would sit and watch each MSN popup, not seeing her log in at all. It was like those lone cowboy movies, where you're out in the middle of the desert. Heat beating down upon you and you're thirsty. As I turned to look at the TV, I didn't notice, but she came online. She sent me a message. I glanced back to see a message for me and a smile on my face.

She then asked me of a question. She asked, "Will you love me?" My mind puzzled and I answered her, "How can I love you within a day of meeting, why not we get to know each other much better?" I certainly couldn't love someone I just met in a single day. I just couldn't do this, if I were to tell her I would love, I knew I was sure to break her heart within time. She begged of me to just love her, just love her even if I were to break her heart. Even just for one day, she would be happy to be my love. I explained to her that I couldn't love like that, I hate breaking hearts and wasn't willing to do that to her since she was so nice to me.

Yet, she wanted me to either way. I told her to let me think about it since there was something questioning my mind. Something stumped my mind and wouldn't let me get with her. I felt as if I were in a trap with myself. I set this up but yet caught myself only.

And so that night, I figured my thoughts. I couldn't bare break her heart. She reminded me of someone. Someone who I spent over a year praising, trying to mold us into a good relationship. The looks, their face were exact to the point where it scared me a bit. Not because of ugliness, but of the similarity between them. I broke one's heart, I was sure history would repeat itself and could not bare to break another's heart. Like a fairy tale, I left it untold that she reminded me of someone that I once loved...